Is it harder to make friends when you’re older? Yes. At least, that’s been my experience. It’s not impossible, and it does require that you open up your ideas on how to meet people and who to have in your friend circles, but the pals you have when you’re older are just as valuable and special as the ones you have earlier in your life.
Choosing your friends wisely is important though. If you’ve got folks who nag or judge you, you’ll feel as if there is something wrong with you. Being single is a lifestyle choice that is either temporary or permanent, depending on what you want out of life. Here are five types of friends to make it a positive experience.
The Friend Who Is Also Single
It’s not that coupled up folks can’t empathize with where you’re at in life, it’s like they won’t be able to experience the same things as you. You need a single friend (or three!) who can drop everything at a moment’s notice and head out to a movie or weekend trip when you feel like it.
And not that dating is a chore (or something horrible), but it’s nice to have another person out there where you can explain the goofy/frustrating/annoying date you had using the least amount of words possible. In short? they’ll get it the minute you start talking. As a result, you’ll feel better faster.
The Friend Who Has Known You Forever
It’s nice to have someone who knows all about your fears and challenges, and keeps encouraging you. A friend who has known you a long time also has your best interest at heart, so if you’re unsure if someone you’re dating is right for you, they’ll be able to give you some perspective.
The Much Younger Friend
Let’s face it, we midlifers are the most vibrant and varied of any generation that came before. We’re caring for young kids and parents, we’re starting new careers, and we’re redefining what age really means. But that doesn’t mean we don’t get stuck in a rut occasionally. Part of being a midlifer is finding what’s comfortable for us.
The trouble is, sometimes getting outside your comfort zone is exactly what you need to make your single life more fulfilling. Having a friend who is considerably younger than you will expose you to different things and encourage you to try a new method of meeting people or a better way to break up. They’ll give you an entirely different perspective on what it means to be single that you can use to better your own life.
The Social Butterfly
The social butterflies in your life will not only keep you from getting depressed (“What? You got dumped? You need to come out to the next party with me.”) you’ll also get invited to a lot more events. Your social butterfly friend will never let you wallow, but will instead get you out of the house on all those days when you don’t feel like it. In other words, they’ll force you to move on and you’ll feel that much better for it.
A connector is different than a social butterfly in that their gift is in introducing people to each other. They might not attend the latest parties, but they’ll know someone that did. In other words, if you need help (a plumber, painter, or babysitter) or fun (a new friend or a romantic date), they’ve got you covered.